If there's one thing I've learned from the three major moves I've made in the past three years, its making friends is hard work!
But, since having friends is so important to making a new place feel like home, there's nothing else to do than get out, get out, get out, get out. Having children has got to be the best way into many groups in the fastest way. You immediately have some common ground to start on and a topic than can easily wind you in and out of many areas of conversation.
Finding new friends via the web has been one of my latest ventures. The website Meet Up coordinates people around an interest or geography to find each other, plan meetings and introduce members to each other.
I've joined a couple of Meet Up groups in San Diego - some mom's groups in my suburb and a Dutch culture group. (The Finnish ladies have their own group coordinated via the fantabulous and information saturated San Diego Finns website.)
My main Meet Up group has 3 - 4 activities organized each week. Park playdates, lunches, outtings to local attractions and even birth story sharing sessions number among the events. When we're available, I make an effort to get us out to the Meet Up. Sometimes its a great event where I get to meet several moms. Other times, its a total dud because I can't find the members and after asking 5 -6 random people if they are here for a Meet Up and getting that oh-my-god-ewww-creepy-internet-lady look, I call it quits.
Still, I keep going knowing that friendships form only after many, many meetings. First, you have to become a familiar face, then, perhaps get to know a handful of people and eventually, you find your connection grows beyond just the fact that 'hey, we are both moms, let's chat about diapers, food, preschool, lack of sleep, where did you buy that stroller?!'
It all makes me love my lifelong friends just a little bit more :-)
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