Mother's Day

I had a very nice Mother's Day -- a collection of cards were part of my wake-up, papa had brought home flowers & pastries from the Swedish Royal Bakery and we spent the day among the flowers at Carlsbad's Flower Fields.

Ever since I had Peanut & Tex I've gained a new perspective on my mom, my upbringing and who I am today.

My mom raised two children mostly as a single parent which I now can imagine was an exhausting role. She did it without a family network around her since we lived in Florida far away from her connections in Finland at a time when an international phone call was only for emergencies and very special occassions.

As we all as parents must do at some point or another - I find myself channeling my mom. But, I hope more for the positive values she modeled and the self confidence she instilled.

I want Peanut & Tex to be nature lovers who feel responsible for maintaining and contributing to the Earth's well being. I always knew that I wanted my children to grow up running bare foot outdoors searching for ladybugs, snails and other creatures. I hope they grow up admiring the beauty around us and wondering about the amazing events of nature.

I want my children to respect themselves and others in their actions, words and intentions.

I want to encourage my children to be creative thinkers able to express themselves in arts, crafts, music, words and any other channel they can imagine. I hope they will believe in what they create and feel passionate about its value.

I want them to fall in love with books, stories, poems, tales, newspapers, magazines -- and the Internet as a way to discover new places, ideas and answers to their questions.

I want them to value education.

Its a long list and I could go on, but in these areas I am thankful to have a mother who has shown me how to teach these things. And, most of all, I'm thankful to her for raising me surrounded by these beliefs.

A Boy and his Cow

"Boooooo, Moooooooo" Tex suddenly called out one day and pointed to a black & white stuffed cow.

Since then, "Boo" has been his lovey. I don't know what inspired his attachment and why he fixated on this toy, but it is somehow appropriate.

I quickly tried to introduce Kitty-Cat as a back-up to Boo. Afterall, both these toys are black & white and fairly similar. Tex seems happy with the idea. Both help soothe him to sleep and when he's feeling a bit unsure. He loves to twirl his finger around in Boo's ear and use Kitty-Cat's tail to brush along his eyebrows. If these make him feel better, than I'm happy for him.

Peanut also honed in on her beloved Pooh Bear around the same age. Though now that she's three, Pooh & Blanket have been displaced by imaginary friends that easily go and appear where she is. I think this is a great development! We no longer have to worry about losing a precious friend or having to separate Peanut from her lovey for its much-needed bi-weekly wash. She'll just hold out her empty hand and say guess who's here, mama? It maybe Ice Cream Truck, it may be a Bee, there is a whole cast of characters to choose from.

As different as night & day

A very late night and a very early day that is.

Peanut takes after her papa and is a night owl. We've always had her bedtime around 7:30 - 8:00 pm so she gets enough sleep and we get a chance to spend some quiet time in the evening. Though were it up to Peanut, she'd be bouncing around until well past 10 pm. Now, I know why it was so tough for us to get her to bed peacefully when she was a baby - she just wasn't ready to go!

Lately, she's built up her arsenal of stalling techniques and usually isn't in bed until around 9 pm! First there's bath time. Then after racing around naked for a while, she selects a nightgown. Then she wants to "play for a little bit". Recently, she's started asking for an evening snack. This to be followed by stories - "only 5 books tonight mama" she imitates Olivia the pig. Then, its potty time which usually requires her to go through another book. With that over, its time to brush and floss her teeth. Well, finally into her room and in bed! Then its "I need fresh water". Followed by "tell me the belly-button story" and finally good night.

In the meantime, little Tex has shut-down when the clock struck 7:30 pm. If mama & papa are not watching the time in the evening and we are all still downstairs after 7 pm, Tex has been known to head for the staircase himself and start to go up cause he wants to go to bed. He can barely keep his eyes open after bath time and we only on the rarest occassion hear a peep (OK, in his case, banging on the wall) of protest. He's been that easy to put to bed since the very first night he was home from the hospital. I remember being so amazed that he didn't need anything to settle down.

But, come 6:00 am, Tex is raring to go. While going to bed was a dream, waking up has never been pleasant. Tex basically turns on - opens his eyes and mouth to start screaming right away. Even though I'm a morning person, this has been one of the most difficult transitions since he arrived. There is nothing gentle, forgiving or relenting about his wake-up yell. It demands you wretch yourself from bed immediately and see what he needs. Plus, we know Peanut is not a morning person so we want her to sleep as late as possible.

Tex isn't one for cuddling with us in bed. We try to bring him in in hopes gaining a few more minutes of rest, but he's interested in banging on the window, wiggling about and getting us downstairs to get him breakfast -- NOW!!!!!!!!

Love - All

As long as I can remember my dad has played tennis. He tried many times in my childhood to get my sister and I interested. It never really stuck. Maybe it was too slow, required too much skill to be exciting; or maybe I had too many other activities vying for my time.

For an embarrassingly long time since I became an adult, I've intended to sign up for a tennis class. FINALLY - I've done it! Its just with the local community activity center, but we've got a great coach (my dad got to play my coach and said so ;-)) and I'm having lots of fun. I can see how the game becomes addictive.
Grandy is also keen to get the next generation out of the court and has already bought Peanut her first racquet when she was about a year old. There must be something to it. Grandy bounced the ball around on the racquet when we visited him and the next time Peanut saw him many months later, the first thing she did was turn around, run out of the room to her room and return holding her tennis racquet.

During their visit here last month, Grandy took us all out for a little training session. It was Papa's first time on a tennis court and it was hard to break out of the squash playing mold as you can tell by the "I'm going to send this one into orbit" look of determination on his face.

Happy Birthday Little Dude!

Butterfly Place

Peanut being a girl, loves butterflies.

So, earlier this week we went to walk among the fluttering creatures at the Butterfly Place with a friend back from our playgroup in Texas who had moved up here more than a year ago!

The Butterfly Place is a privately owned indoor atrium where hundreds of butterflies float freely through (or sometimes just sleep in the middle of the walkways) their mini tropical forest.

What I didn't count on was how unnerving it could be to have a butterfly with an 8-inch wingspan come diving at you (Ok, it wasn't really diving, just fluttering) so you could really see the legs and fuzzy body. Maybe I hadn't had enough sleep the night before and maybe I'd had one too many cups of coffee that morning, but I was almost ducking and diving my way through the atrium.

Peanut's been talking about the butterflies all week and evidently the man who told us about the caterpillars also made an impression since she often mentions him, too.

Tex also had a good time, gazing up at the skylights on the ceiling and certainly seeing some of the butterflies (they were so big!) especially the one that landed right next to his toes in the stroller.

Did you know that each butterfly species caterpillars can only eat certain types of leaves? I did not! I thought was the flowers that attracted butterflies, but as the Caterpillar Man told us, its the trees.

Dreaming of Rice Cream

Little Tex has a sensitive belly.

Around two weeks of age, we noticed he was very unhappy after milk and if put down on his back the milk would come gurgling back up. He was wriggly, fussy, crying and fighting with large gulps to keep the milk down. I heard the milk as it gurgled and bubbled in his belly. One morning, a large handful of milk came flying out of him. I know babies are different and we couldn't expect him to be as calm as Peanut was, but something off.

I took him in to the see the pediatrician, who after listening to my quick concerns said I had just run down the the checklist for infant reflux without missing a beat. Its a common condition caused by the upper digestive tract not being fully developed. Essentially the valve that should keep stomach contents down, doesn't fully function allowing food back up along with painful stomach acid.

Tex was prescribed Zantac to help reduce the acid production so the reflux wouldn't be so painful. We still had to keep him upright for 30 - 40 minutes after feedings and also tilted his crib so the head end was at around a 30 degree angle. The change in him was phenomenal. We finally had a baby who was happy after meals and much more peaceful.

Around two months, Tex started suffering painful bouts of gas that caused him to cry, again generally be unhappy and produce pure liquid poop (sorry for the image, but this is a mom's blog!). I started evaluating what I was eating and hit the internet for some ideas on what might be causing the discomfort.

I went for an elimination diet to cut out the common offenders: diary, peanut, egg and
soy. Wheat is another big one, but I started with the others. It seemed that diary products were his issue. Nothing scientific, just my own testing. Usually at this age, its not lactose intolerence, but rather the whey protein.

Out went the milk in the morning coffee, in came in Rice Milk. No more chocolate, cheese, butter or ice cream! And careful reading of labels helps me spot whey in many more products from bread and crackers to meats and meals.

Now after several months, its OK. I take a calcium supplement to make up for what I'm not getting. Dropping diary also resulted in a rapid drop of several pounds. I just miss the ice cream during summer -- and there is supposed to be Rice Dream Ice Cream out there, I just can't seem to fine it!

A.W.O.L. or just M.O.T?

Its been a busy month for us! Graduating to "Mother of Two" has been a big leap, but I feel I'm getting my bearings.

Just today, I headed out for an unplanned and unexpected diaper run with both Peanut and Tex. Any new mom will know that "unplanned" and "unexpected" with new babies is a feat. It was only the second time I hit the road on my own with them. It still takes some logistical juggling for me, but I did it without breaking a sweat.

Compare this to the first time I went to the grocery store alone with Peanut in Finland. I thought the whole venture through very carefully several times and even planned the exact time to head out between feedings, diapers, etc. I was a nervous wreck as I moved her carry-cot out of our apartment into the elevator.

This time around, I've got some experience under the belt and am a bit more relaxed.

We've had a lot more going on around here than just bringing Tex into our lives. We'll soon be leaving the Big D for the home of the Big Dig -- Boston! Peanut's papa has taken a new position up there and we are already hot & heavy into the "relo" (as those in the biz call it!) process. Our home is for sale, movers are making estimates and I'm thinking I should have kept those snow boots!!!

Tex has arrived!

March 14, 2007
14:25
9 lbs 15 oz
(oh, let's just call it 10 lbs! Everything is bigger here in Texas!)
21 inches

Happy, healthy and at home with mama, papa & big sis Peanut

Heading into the home stretch!

Finally in the last month with Tex!! We're almost as ready as we can be to welcome him. Just need to finalize that middle name .....

I've been seeing the doctor now once a week. At 37 weeks, we had our final ultrasound to check on Tex's position, the health of the placenta, amount of amniotic fluid, make a weight estimate and otherwise take a final look. Good news is that he is headed south and everything critical checked out fine. He got an 8/8 on his biometric profile :-) We also got to count some little toes and fingers, see his well-rounded cheeks and verify he is indeed a he. Tex weighed in around 6 lbs already with another 1/2 lb - 1 lb expected before birth. Peanut was 7.9 lbs herself so it sounds reasonable.

In addition the ultrasound check, in the US at this point most pregnant women are screened for group B streptococcus (GBS) bacteria. This is something that never came up in Finland and so I was not tested with Peanut.

Between 10 and 30 percent of pregnant women carry GBS bacteria in the vagina or rectal area, where they may pass it to their babies during labor or birth. With proper prenatal testing and treatment during labor, though, the risk is small.

Without treatment, one or two out of every 200 babies born to "GBS positive" mothers would become infected with the bacteria and develop what's called early-onset GBS disease ... which can cause sepsis (an infection in the blood), pneumonia, and meningitis in newborns....

getting screened when you're between 35 and 37 weeks of pregnancy and receiving antibiotic treatment during labor if you test positive will greatly reduce your baby's risk of becoming infected

During the last month at each visit, my doctor also does a pelvic exam to see if the cervix has begun dilating and/or effacing in preparation for labor. I'm not sure about the value of these exams since a woman can walk around 2 cm dilated for weeks and not go into labor while someone who had no progress can suddenly go into full labor.

If Tex follows his big sister's example, we won't be seeing him for another several weeks :-)

Wham, Bam, Thank You Ma'am!

I had another pre-natal appointment for Tex this morning. It was the usual drill - sit in the waiting room for 20 mins, meet the nurse for 5 mins to measure weight and check blood pressure, quick trip to the bathroom, sit waiting in the doctor's room for 15 mins and, then, at long last, meet the doctor for a quick, clinical 10 mins to measure my belly, listen to the heartbeat and answer "no, no, no" to "any cramping, any bleeding, any questions?"

"Ok, great, see you again in two weeks."

In a way its efficient and we all get to know what we need to know. I don't have so many questions this time around since I've been through this before and, fortunately, nothing unusual is happening.

My pre-natal appointments for Peanut in Finland covered the same basic health checks, but then the midwife also was interested in how was I feeling - really - and how were things at home otherwise. Were we getting everything ready? Was I eating, sleeping, emotionally feeling OK? She also usually checked my hands for signs of swelling. And, then we spent a bit more time discussing how my measurements were tracking since she hand wrote them all into my Neuvola booklet which I carried with me. I always knew exactly what month/day we were at and how much weight I had gained compared to last week and how much my belly had grown.

Tex enters his third trimester

We marked the beginning of Tex's third trimester with a test-filled visit to the doctor. Auntie Em happened to be in town and got to experience it all first-hand....

My appointment included the one-hour (non-fasting) glucose screen test for gestational diabetes which is given to all pregnant women here. I had eaten an small omlet with some cheese and ham in the morning, and tried to avoid all sources of sugars to make sure the test result was as clean as possible.

We arrived on time, but sat around waiting for 30 mins until I re-checked with reception. In a rather unfriendly way, the receptionist said she'd check with my nurse to see what was happening. 15 mins later, she called me back to drink the 50 grams of sugary, room-temp glucose. I had 5 mins to get it down and then we ran through the other usual check-up measurements after which I was shown to a room to wait for the doctor. His visit was also quick once he arrived - a check of the heartbeat and measuring my abdomen.

From now on out, we'll be back every two weeks.

I still had 30 mins before it was time to draw blood for the glucose screen so we took a fast driving tour of downtown Grapevine. At the appointed time, I went back to the lab so blood could be taken for the glucose screen, an anemia test and and Rh antibody test. Results later though I get the Rhogam injection pretty much regardless of the Rh antibody test outcome.

Back in Helsinki with Peanut, it was nice that our neuvola was never very busy. We would arrive and go directly to the door of our mid-wife and usually had no wait. Sometimes she was wrapping up a previous appointment, but then it would be 5 mins at the max. She handled all the measuring, most tests and appointments herself. The anemia test consisted of a pin-prick to my finger and she had the results immediately from a gadget on her desk. I did have to go to the lab downstairs for Rh antibody tests though never was given an injection since the results were always negative. There was never any mention of a glucose screen test - I don't know if they profile the mothers and test only those who seem high risk or if some sort of diagnosis can be made otherwise.

Making a down payment on Tex

At our recent 20 week prenatal visit, we were stopped at the receptionist on our way out. It was time to discuss insurance and payments for Tex.

The receptionist pulled out a worksheet where it outlined the "global obstetrical fee" (ie, the package deal for prenatal care + delivery of baby + postpartum 6 week check-up for mama. It excludes possible anesthesia (epidural) and post delivery hospital costs for mom and any baby-related care costs. Since we have chosen an in-network doctor and hospital, we got a special discounted rate of $2,369.00.

After we pay our annual deductible ($300.00), our insurance covers 80% of the remaining fee leaving us with a balance of $714. The entire amount has to paid by the 28th week of pregnancy though we could make interest-free payments up to that date.

As we tried to understand what else we could be billed for, the receptionist joked that anyone who enters your room will leave you with a bill, even the guy who sweeps the floor. She added that often the bills will beat the mama and baby home!

It was a very different approach with Peanut's delivery in Finland where a bill for 130 euros arrived weeks later in the mail. On the surface, it looks virtually free, but let's not forget the generous contributions Peanut's papa & I made through the years in taxes. I have no idea what the hospital charged KELA for the delivery so its really hard to compare the real costs. If I'm suddenly overwhelmed with free time, I'll let you know how it works out, but don't hold your breath :-)

Checking in on Tex

I've just had my third prenatal visit for Tex this week.

To catch up, at the second visit, which was around week 12, the nurse met us for the usual weight, blood pressure and urine check before we saw the doctor. This time we also had an ultrasound to make sure Tex's growth rate was on track. There was some confusion between the nurse and doctor so we ended up with just an external (on the belly) ultrasound since the doctor thought I was thin enough for it to suffice. Usually this ultrasound is internal (transv*ginal).

Indeed, we saw Tex waving around. The picture wasn't as clear as the internal would have been, but it allowed the doctor to make the needed measurements. All along, he continued in a very reassuring manner, telling us everything was very normal and on track.

This past visit - after a 40 minute wait in the waiting room - I again first met my usual nurse (whose name I still don't know!) and then my doctor. This time he measured the growth of my uterus and used a doppler device to listen to Tex's heartbeat. He summed up it was all fine, but didn't actually tell me any of the measurements.

I was offered an AFP screening test, something which is not offered in Finland, to screen for certain neural abnormalities, such as Down's Syndrome, spina bifida and anencephaly. It is an optional test, which he said about 50% of his patients opt for and didn't really make any recommendation for me to take or not take. It has a reputation for not being very accurate and
causing more worry than answers.

"Tex" -- arriving early 2007!

The latest news here is that Peanut will become a big sister next year! "Tex" will make his/her appearance in early spring 2007! We thought "Tex" was appropriate as the hospital forms pointed out, we will not just be having a baby, but a new Texan.

We're excited all around and, blogwise, I'm excited about lots of posting ideas comparing pregnancy in the US and Finland.

Its already been a vastly different experience even though we're only a few months along.

To begin with, the doctor wanted to see us as soon as we thought we might be pregnant. In our case that was barely 6.5 weeks along when the tell-tale signs were confirmed with an at-home pregnancy test.

In Finland, I had been advised to wait a bit later before contacting the neuvola - I called around 9 weeks. When I did call, the first question was "Was this a wanted pregnancy?" so they could determine which side of the health clinic to connect me to.

Here, we met the doctor right away. At our first visit, I gave up at least 6 viles of blood for a variety of standard tests: blood type, Rh, blood count, immunity for Rubella, screen for antibodies, hepatitis, syphilis and HIV.

Then, the doctor did a sonogram. I was amazed that you could see/hear anything so early! But, "Tex" was there - a little blurry blob with no distinguishable features, except a strong and clear heartbeat. It was the heartbeat the doctor was after. He was very enthusiastic and explained that once you hear a heartbeat the chance for miscarriage already diminishes to just around 5%.

In Finland, our first meeting with the doctor and a sonogram was at 12 weeks. Before then, we just assumed everything was normal and met with our midwife.

So far, we've paid $15 as our insurance co-pay. However, I've seen what the doctor's office is billing the insurance company:
$960 for blood tests
another $960 for sonograms and doctor's consultations.

Yikes!